Camp.

1st September 2024

Sunday

It howled again last night. We all heard it this time. We stayed up all night. Tammy and Jodie almost cried, but the rest of us just gritted our teeth and made a vow not to tell the councilors. The last time I tried to tell them what was happening, they just looked at me with their fake model smiles and told me it was the wind. But there was no wind, not even around the mountain just behind the camp. It’s the middle of summer; the most we get is a soft breeze. Nothing strong enough to shake the walls of the cabin. 

I wish my parents hadn’t sent me here. I know they thought it’d help, but seriously. How would dumping a group of kids in a glorified field help anyone? If anything, I’ve gotten worse. The intrusive thoughts are still there, and every so often, I find my hands reaching out for a bow and arrow, or a boat oar, or… something worse. Maybe they’re getting worse because I’m not getting enough sleep. Or maybe I’m just losing my mind. Who knows?

2nd September 2024

Monday

It kept us up again. Today, we look like ghosts. Tammy’s on the verge of a nervous breakdown, but when isn’t she? There’s always something with that girl. Then again, at a camp for troubled teens, there’s always something with all of us. I’m the oldest at 14. Christine is the youngest at 11. None of us think we should be here, but our parents do. We’re kids, what are we going to do? Argue with them? Not likely. So we all got shipped off to Happy Times Summer Camp for Troubled Kids. It’s a stupid name considering we’re here all year, not just during summer. I hate that name, and I hate this place. The people are OK, if you don’t include the councilors.
They both seem… strange. They’re in their early twenties, both with dazzling smiles that never leave their faces, both of them attractive enough to be models. How do people like this even exist? And why did they think it’d be a good idea to let them work at a place where the kids they look after hate the way they look? We’re all awkward and gross, and they only make us feel worse just by existing in the same area as us. It sucks. Their refusal to believe us makes it worse.
I get that nobody really believes in monsters anymore, but surely you should at least look into the claims of a group of kids. Especially those who are here for a reason. I’m sick of getting discounted by adults just because I’m a kid. It’s been happening way too much lately. My parents sent me here because I told them that the missing boy was in the well, and now I’m hearing things again. They think I’m crazy, and they think that it’s OK to just ship me off to the middle of nowhere just to get rid of me. They seem to forget that they did find that boy’s body in the well. Just where I knew it’d be. I didn’t see the body myself, but my cousin caught a glimpse when they were dragging him out of the well. He told me that his body looked like a balloon, all blown up, and even the adults looked like they were going to be sick. I wish I could have seen it.

3rd September 2024

Tuesday

I’ve thought of another thing I hate about this place: The lake. It runs on the right hand side of the camp and every so often, when the weather’s nice enough, we’re forced to swim in it. The councilors say that it’ll help us destress and think about why we’re here, but none of us agree. Tommy from the boys’ cabin started screaming earlier. He swore that something grabbed his ankle, even though it turned out to be Mike playing a trick on him. The councilors thought it was funny, but us kids didn’t. We’ve all felt weird stuff since we came here. Christine refuses to go into the Mess Hall because she swears that she saw a man dressed like a cowboy watching her through the window when she first arrived. She eats outside on her own. I’ve never actually seen anything here, but I hear the howling and the screams. The others sometimes hear the howls, but the screams are just for me. I don’t think they’re human. There’s something… animal about them. I don’t really know how to explain it. All I know is that they’ve kept me up for the past four days, which is why I’m writing this. I want a log of everything that’s happened. I’m going to gather as much evidence as I can and then show it to the councilors. They can’t ignore me if I show them evidence, can they?

4th September 2024

Wednesday

5th September 2024

Thursday

It happened again. All night this time. Normally it’s just for an hour or two, but I timed it. The howls started at 11pm and went on until 5am. The screams started at Midnight and stopped at the same time as the howls. I was the only one who heard it. Everyone was already asleep before Lights Out, and they didn’t wake up at all. How could they do that? The pictures on the walls were shaking because of how loud it was. It sounded like whatever was making the noises was right outside the cabin, but I never got out of bed. What if it had seen me?
I know nobody believes me. I wrote to my parents to tell them, but they haven’t bothered to reply. Why would they? I’m just the crazy kid that they want to get rid of. I bet they’re happier without me.
They never knew what to do when I heard things. Like when I heard a voice whispering that Dad was sleeping with the babysitter. I told Mom, and she just gave me a blank stare, asking how I knew. When I told her about the voice, she yelled at me. I could tell she was scared, but who yells at a nine year old for something they can’t control. That’d be like kicking a puppy for wanting to play.
I guess eventually they got sick of me, so they shipped me off here, and now it’s happening again. This time though, people believe me. Yes, it’s just my fellow campers, but someone believes me. When everyone heard it for the first time, Christine insisted on investigating. She may be the youngest, but she’s definitely the most disturbing. We don’t really know why she’s here, but we can guess. Mike snuck his phone into his bunk one night and Googled all of us. It’s his stupid idea of a prank. He didn’t tell us what he found out about Christine, but since that night he refuses to be left alone with her. Even during group activities he refuses to be anywhere near her. We’ve started making fun of him for it. 

6th September 2024

Friday

The investigation officially begins tonight. Tammy’s parents sent her a camera so that she could take photos of the camp to show them, and she promised to let me use it to document anything we find. All of the girls are in. We haven’t told the boys. They’re stupid, and besides, they don’t hear anything. Charlotte asked them once if they’d heard anything, but they’d just kicked her to the ground and rubbed her face in the dirt. They think it’s funny. I wish the monster would go after them and leave us alone. 

*****

We’re ready to go. We have a plan, and a map of the camp.

I’ll update you later.

7th September 2024

Saturday

Nothing happened. We stayed up all night. And nothing happened. No howls. No screams. Nothing. Now everyone really does think I’m crazy.
The plan I made was really simple. Me, Christine and Tammy hid in the woods behind our cabin, waiting. Watching. We were sure something was going to happen. Jodie, Charlotte and Briony stayed in the cabin, looking out of the windows, holding their baseball bats. Jude and Caroline scoped out the lake. I know we never hear the howls near the lake, but something about it is weird. This place has so many mysteries. I want to know about all of them.
I think I fell asleep at some point, because when I woke up, one of the councilors (I think her name’s Janet) was standing next to me, that stupid smile still on her face. She told us that we weren’t meant to be out there, and she made us come back to the cabin. When we got there, one of the other councilors (Jesse is his name) had Jude and Caroline on either side of him, the same weird smile on his face too. They took us into our cabin and told us that it’s forbidden for us to be out of our cabins after Lights Out. I don’t see why. There’s no bears or anything in the woods, and we’re completely safe. Right?

8th September 2024

Sunday

9th September 2024

Monday

10th September 2024

Tuesday

We’re going to try again, and this time, we’re going to find something. For the past couple of days, the screams have seemed closer. Even Charlotte heard them last night. She snuck into my bunk and cuddled up to me all night until it stopped. I don’t mind admitting that I was scared. Having someone else with me… hearing the same things I can hear. It felt nice. In a weird way.
We stayed up, whispering about our lives, until we both fell asleep, and when we woke up, the sun was shining and the screaming had stopped. Everything was OK again. When the others woke up, Charlotte told them what had happened. She thought they might listen more if she was the one that told them. She was right. People never believe me. It’s kind of like my curse. Like that old Greek Seer, Cassandra. Nobody ever believed her either. After Charlotte had finished, the other girls promised that they’d help us. And this time, we’d be more careful. 

The rest of the day was boring. Arts & Crafts, followed by foraging. I don’t get the point of these useless activities. It’s not like we’re ever going to need to know how to tie a knot or which mushrooms are poisonous. That’s what grocery stores are for. The best part of the day was the campfire.

Once a week, every Tuesday, we have a campfire in the clearing next to the lake. I don’t understand why they decided it was a good idea to have it in the middle of the week. It seems more like a weekend thing. But I love it. I love the fire. The way it flickers and makes the shadows go long on everyone’s faces. The only thing that could make it better would be if the councilors weren’t there. Jesse had a ukulele tonight. It was annoying. And the entire time, they all had that smile. They kept telling us that if we ever heard anything in the woods, or outside the cabins, it was just the wind. The way they said it was creepy. Like they knew they were lying to us. Like they knew what was really making the noises. Me and Charlotte talked about it just after Lights Out. She snuck into my bunk again. We both agreed that something strange was happening, and we made a promise to each other that we would find out what. No matter what happened.

11th September 2024

Wednesday

Wednesday is our ‘rest day’, which meant that me and Charlotte could spend all day working on our next plan. We’ll let the others know when the time comes, but for now, it’s our little secret. While the others spent the day outside, playing and swimming, we hid in the cabin, drawing more maps and coming up with any plan we could think of. Charlotte thinks it’s pretty good, but I’m not too sure. We need to include the boys, and I really really don’t want to. I don’t trust them. They’re just so… different to us. More emotional. More angry. But if Charlotte thinks it’ll help, then I’ll do it. After all, we’re going to need a distraction. Our plan takes care of the councilors this time. The boys will sneak out of their cabin and take a boat to the middle of the lake. They’ll pretend they can’t get back, successfully distracting the councilors while us girls make our way into the woods. I know there’s something out there, and it probably has a lair. We’re going to find it. I’m going to find proof that I’m not crazy. It’s all happening next week so we can have time to prepare. We’re only going to tell the others on the day, so that there’s less chance for the councilors to find out. I hope they all agree to help. 

12th September 2024

Thursday

The boys are scared of the lake now. Today we went boating. It was a nice day. I much prefer being in a boat to being in the water. We were all having a nice time. Me, Charlotte, Christine, Jodie and Councilor Jesse were in a boat together, and the others were with Councilor Janet in the other boat. Everything was going fine. We were laughing as we rowed, and for once I was actually enjoying myself. But then I heard it. The howling. It didn’t sound close this time, maybe because we were in the middle of the lake. But I heard it. I think the councilors did too. Jesse stopped smiling, and his eyes got wider. He kept trying to get Janet’s attention, but she wasn’t paying attention. She kept looking into the woods. Her smile was gone too. They look weird when they’re not smiling. I also never noticed how similar they look. Maybe they’re related.
Anyway, we were there on the lake, listening to the howling, when I noticed that the other boat was moving, but none of them were rowing. And it was moving to the side, not forwards or backwards like boats normally do. It was almost like something was pushing them away from us. The boys and Tammy kept trying to get Janet’s attention, but she just kept looking into the woods. She looked scared. Christine tried to get Jesse to help them, but he just kept looking into the woods too. I followed his gaze and I swear I saw something. I don’t know what it was. It moved too fast for me to see properly. But there was something in the woods, watching us.
I opened my mouth to tell the others. I wanted to shout and point and make them see, but the world turned upside down, and then we were in the water. The boat was on top of us, and my mouth filled with water. I couldn’t see. I couldn’t breathe. I tried to swim up, but the boat was in the way. And then I felt it. Something cold and slimy grazed my leg, and I looked down. The lake is really dirty, so I couldn’t see anything. All of a sudden, I remembered the stories about sea monsters my parents used to tell me, before they sent me here. I could imagine the sharp teeth and the blood that would fill the water. In a weird way, it excited me.
I felt someone pulling me up to the surface, and then I could see the sky again. Jesse was gripping my arm, his smile back in place as he trod water and gathered us kids up. Janet swam over and helped him get our boat the right side up. I don’t know where her boat went. I couldn’t see it. They loaded us kids into the boat and pushed it back to the shore. It was only when we got back on dry land that we realized that Mike wasn’t with us. I wondered where he was, and then we heard him screaming. We saw him in the middle of the lake, trying to stay on top of the water, and then he went under, like something grabbed him. Jodie started crying, and the boys kept yelling. Everything was so loud. I couldn’t concentrate on one thing at a time, and I started to shake. I don’t know if it was because I was cold and wet or if it was because everything was too much, but when I managed to calm myself down, Jesse was back in the water, swimming to where Mike was. We all watched him dive under the water, that stupid smile still on his face. It felt like hours until we saw him again. Tommy was the first one to see him. He jumped up and down on the dock and pointed. We all looked and saw Jesse dragging Mike behind him as he swam back to us. When they got to us, Jesse laid Mike down on the ground and we all gathered around. His eyes were closed, and his clothes were torn, and he wasn’t breathing. Janet pushed Jesse out of the way and began pressing on his chest and blowing air into his mouth. I think it’s called CPR. She tried for a long time, but he never started breathing again. When she finally gave up, Mike was pale white. Nobody said anything for a long time. I was the first one to speak. I looked around and noticed that Briony was missing, but when I asked where she was, everyone ignored me except for Janet, who said that there wasn’t a camper with that name. But I know that there is. She’s my friend. Her bunk is directly across the cabin from mine. I chose not to push it. Everyone was still watching Jesse try to save Mike.
I couldn’t stop staring at his body. I wanted to reach out and touch it, but I knew that the councilors wouldn’t like that. So I didn’t.

13th September 2024

Friday

14th September 2024

Saturday

Nobody really said anything yesterday. A van came to get Mike’s body, but none of us saw it. We were confined to our cabins, but we heard it. I tried to look out the window to get a peek at it, but Janet was standing in front of the cabin, talking to Jesse. I don’t know how, but I think she knew I was there. She turned to look at me, and her smile faded for a moment as she stared at me, shaking her head. It creeped me out, so I closed the curtain and went back to my bunk. I need to talk to Charlotte. There’s no way the boys will agree to help us now. I don’t even know if the girls will want to help. Tammy, Christine and Jodie have been crying on and off all day, and Charlotte’s been staring at the wall for a while now. I still don’t know where Briony is, I haven’t seen her in a few days.
Everyone’s scared. I can understand that, but how can they not want revenge? Something obviously killed Mike. Something dangerous. How can they not want to know what it was? The councilors aren’t any better. When they’d taken us back to our cabins (they left Mike on the docks while they did), I asked about the howling. They kept smiling while they told me that it was just the wind. They’re both liars. I hate being lied to.

15th September 2024

Sunday

I’m going to sneak out of the cabin tonight. I’m not going to tell anyone, not even Charlotte. We haven’t really spoken since the other day. I don’t think I can trust her anymore. I tried to talk to her about our plan today during lunch, but she just gave me a weird look and shook her head. She said she doesn’t think it’s a good idea after what happened to Mike. She told me that she’s scared. I can understand that, but I want to know what’s happening in this place. There’s something in the lake, and there’s something in the woods. I need to find out what it is. My plan is simple: I’ll wait until everyone’s asleep, then climb out of the window. Our cabin door squeaks when it opens, so at least nobody will hear me leave. I’m going to check out the lake first. I think that whatever is in there is trapped. The thing in the woods isn’t. It seems a little safer at the lake, as long as I don’t go in the water. After the other day, I don’t think I’m going in the water ever again. I’m going to look for the missing boat. It still hasn’t shown up. Hopefully I’ll be able to find it. I’m sure that it will have some answers. Maybe some scratches or marks from whatever killed Mike. I will finally have evidence that something wrong is happening here.

16th September 2024

Monday

I don’t want to talk about it.

17th September 2024

Tuesday

18th September 2024

Wednesday

Mike isn’t dead. Well, that’s not really true. He is dead, but he’s also back. When we woke up this morning and went to the Mess Hall for breakfast, we heard screaming coming from the boys’ cabin. Tommy and Kevin ran out crying, and hid behind us. They kept whimpering, and we couldn’t understand what they were trying to say, and then Charlotte screamed. We all looked at the cabin and froze when we saw Mike standing in the doorway, dressed in his pajamas and looking at us as if he was very confused. Jesse and Janet ran over to us and stopped when they saw him, their stupid smiles coming back. Janet told us that the van that came to pick him up was actually an ambulance. She said that he wasn’t dead, just unconscious. I don’t believe her. We all saw his body. They left him lying on the dock all night before they came to pick him up. There is no way he didn’t die. But how is he back? It just proves that there is definitely something wrong with this camp. It’s made me more sure than ever that something horrible is happening, and I’m determined to get to the bottom of it.

19th September 2024

Thursday

Mike has the same smile as the councilors now. We’ve all noticed it. It’s exactly the same as Jesse and Janet’s smiles. It’s fake, but it never leaves his face. Even this morning. He was running around, acting like an idiot like he always did, when he fell over. I saw the blood coming from his knee. Before he died, he would have been crying and screaming, but he never stopped smiling. It gave us all the creeps.
The one good thing about him being back from the dead is that Charlotte believes me again. She snuck into my bunk again last night. She apologized for brushing me off and promised that she’d help me figure out what was going on. That’s when I noticed how cold she was. We cuddled until we fell asleep.
We’re going to talk to the other girls tomorrow and see if they’ll help. I don’t think Jodie will – she’s scared of everything, but I know that Christine will. She might be the youngest of us all, but that girl is seriously messed up.

20th September 2024

Friday

The girls AND the boys are going to help us. Tommy and Kevin barged into our cabin just before Lights Out to tell us that something weird is going on with Mike. He fell asleep before them last night, and they stayed up to watch him. Kevin said that he didn’t stop smiling, even in his sleep. It freaked them out more than the howling, or the lake, or anything else. Finally, the others are starting to realize what I knew as soon as I got here: This place isn’t normal.
We’re going to sneak out just before Midnight. We’re going to barricade the door to the councilor’s cabin so that they can’t catch us, and we’re going into the woods. It’s strange though. I haven’t heard the howling since Mike died. But I know that the monster is still out there, waiting for us to lower our guard so it can come and get us. I’m not going to let that happen. I’ve given everyone tasks so that we’re ready for tonight. The boys are going to break into the activities shed and grab anything they can find that we could use for weapons. I hope they come back with bows and arrows. Tammy is going to lend me her camera so that I can take photos of anything we find. Charlotte’s going to climb into the trees to see if she can find anything. I think I remember Dad telling me once that a ‘high vantage point’ can be an advantage, whatever that means. And Christine is going to stay by the cabin, just in case the councilors manage to get out of their cabin. I stole Jesse’s whistle from his room earlier. He shouldn’t keep his window open, especially in a camp for Troubled Kids. I’ve given it to Christine and she’s wearing it under her dress. If she sees Jesse or Janet out of their cabin, her job is to blow the whistle as hard and as loud as she can so that we know what’s going on.
It’s almost Lights Out. Janet will be coming to lock us in soon. We’re almost ready.

21st September 2024

Saturday

THEY’RE LYING TO US ALL. They know it isn’t the wind! And now we know what it is.
The plan went perfectly. We managed to sneak out and meet up with the boys by the lake. I refused to go near it, so the others went ahead and came back to meet me afterwards. When we’d gathered our weapons (mostly baseball bats and hockey sticks) we made our way into the woods. We had no idea where we were going, so we chose a random direction. Me and Tommy took the lead. Charlotte took the trees. Every so often she called down to us, but we were walking for ages before she told us anything interesting.
She saw a cave in the mountain, and there was a light. In our minds, it was obviously the monster’s lair, so we changed direction and began hiking up the mountain. It wasn’t hard to do. We’ve done it so many times, whenever Jesse and Janet think we’re getting too lazy. They always take us up the easy trail, but this one was more difficult. It was steeper, and there were more rocks and tree branches across the path. We managed it though. We moved whatever we could and climbed over anything we couldn’t. Jodie said that it almost felt like something had put everything in the way to block us from getting to the cave. I told her that it was obviously the monster. It knew we were coming for it, and it wanted to stop us.
The sun was coming up by the time we got to the cave. Part of me wanted to turn back before Jesse and Janet realized we were missing, but a bigger part of me wanted answers. We stood in front of the entrance to the cave and just stared inside for a long minute. None of us said anything. We didn’t need to. We all knew that whatever we found in the cave would be dangerous, and we all knew that we’d look after each other, no matter what happened. Tommy coughed and asked who wanted to go first. As the leader, I said I would, and I stepped into the cave.
All I saw was candles. So many candles. Why does a monster need candles? When I wasn’t brutally murdered, the others came into the cave, and we looked around for a bit. We found a lot of papers. I was confused at first. I didn’t know monsters could read. But then Tammy found something else: Two ID’s. The photos were of Jesse and Janet, but the names had been left blank. That’s when it hit me. There is no monster. Janet and Jesse ARE the monster! They take turns making the howling noises and scaring us. Maybe they think we want to run away, and this is their way of stopping us. But it still doesn’t make sense. Why are the names on the ID’s blank? Why did they choose a cave for their lair when they have perfectly good rooms in their cabin? Does this mean that there’s nothing in the lake? And if the lake is empty, what did I see? I suddenly got scared. Were they behind that too? It really doesn’t make sense. I still think something else is going on, but I just don’t know what. But I promise I’ll find out.
I made sure to take lots of photos of the cave with Tammy’s camera, so at least there’s evidence that it exists. Now, I just need to find a way to get the photos to the police, or someone’s parents, so that we can finally get out of this place. 

22nd September 2024

Sunday

When we got back to camp, Charlotte snuck into my bed. It’s become our thing now. She’s only a year younger than me, and it’s nice to be friends with someone my own age. The others are just kids compared to us.
She could tell that something was bothering me, and she asked me what was wrong. I decided to trust her. After all, she was the one who told us about the cave. She wouldn’t do that if she was a part of the councilor’s plans. I decided to tell her about my night at the lake. 

I did find the boat that night. Or rather, it found me. I was sitting on the dock, wrapped in my blanket, waiting for any sign that there was a monster in the lake, when I saw something moving towards me in the water. I jumped up and put my fists up. I felt stupid. I’m a 14 year old girl. I can’t fight a sea monster.
It wasn’t a monster. As it got closer, I saw the red paint and the camp logo, and I realized that it was the missing boat. When it was close enough, I reached out to drag it to the dock, and that’s when I saw the claw marks in the bottom of the boat. The wood was splintered, and I could see why it had sunk to the bottom of the lake. There is no way it could have stayed afloat in that condition. What I couldn’t figure out is why it was floating now. I realized too late that there was something under the messed up chunk of wood.
I opened my mouth to scream just as a small hand reached out of the water, grabbing my wrist. It pulled me in. I fell into the lake with a splash, and dirty lake water filled my mouth, making me choke. I could still feel the hand on my wrist, but I couldn’t see anything. It’s hard enough seeing anything in that lake during the day – there’s no way I’d be able to see anything at night. I fought as hard as I could, trying to get back to the surface, but I didn’t know where the surface was. I’d gotten all turned around under the water. I couldn’t hold my breath for much longer. I managed to open my eyes long enough to see Briony staring back at me, her eyes dead and lifeless. Everything screamed at me to stop fighting, but I was scared. My body went into fight or flight, and it chose flight. I kicked my feet out, hitting her in the stomach, and she finally let go of me. I began swimming up, and up, and up, until I reached the surface. I gasped and began swimming back to the dock as fast as I could. I didn’t stop until I was safely out of the water. I stared at the lake while I caught my breath, waiting for Briony to reach out again, but she never did. I checked my arm, and I started crying. Normally when someone grabs your arm, they leave bruises shaped like fingers. Briony didn’t. Instead, all around my wrist were red, circular marks like suckers. It looked like I’d been grabbed by an octopus. But I was sure she had hands, not tentacles. That was the first time I thought that I was truly going insane.
I showed Charlotte the marks on my arm. They were faded, but they were still there. Her eyes went wide, and she stared at them for a long time before she asked who Briony was. Nobody seems to remember her, but I know she was a camper. We all met her. I told Charlotte this, but she looked at me in a weird way and said that it had only ever been us. That freaked me out more than anything that’s happened lately. Every day that passes makes me question my sanity even more.

23rd September 2024

Monday

Christine has the smile. I’m not sure how, but when we woke up this morning, she was already dressed and stood by the door, her back to us. When we tried to talk to her, she turned to us, and I think I screamed the loudest. The whistle was still on its string around her neck, so we know it wasn’t Jesse that got her. He would have tried to get his whistle back. I’m questioning everything. Maybe there really is a monster up in the mountain.

24th September 2024

Tuesday

I dreamed about the boy in the well last night, for the first time in a long time.
When my parents had asked how I’d known where he was, I couldn’t tell them. I didn’t know how I knew that. It felt like the place he was most likely to be, so that’s where I said he was. But I know how I knew now. It’s because I put him there. He wasn’t alive when I put him there. I took care of that. He’d been bullying me at school for a long time, and one day I had enough. So I let him chase me into the forest by the school, then I hid behind a tree until he came closer. The rock in my hand was heavy, but I was too angry at him to notice. He ran past me and stopped, looking around. I’m not sure how he didn’t see me, but thankfully he didn’t. I managed to sneak up on him. I still remember the thunk the rock made as it hit the back of his skull. It made me happy. He fell to the ground but I didn’t stop. I hit his head again, and again, and again, until there wasn’t much left. It was only afterwards that I realized that I’d killed him. It didn’t upset me. The only thing I could think of was that they’d find him if I left him here. Some of the other kids had seen him chase me, and they’d tell the police about it. I didn’t know what to do. Then I saw the well. It had been boarded up for years because of a kid that fell in a long time ago, but the wood was all rotten and gross. It wasn’t hard to rip it off. The hardest part was dragging his body. He was heavier than he looked, but I managed it. I think I laughed as I watched him tumble into the darkness. It excited me to think of him down there.
I can never tell anyone about this. I need to take this secret to my grave.

25th September 2024

Wednesday

26th September 2024

Thursday

To whoever finds this diary: RUN.

I’m writing this while hiding under my bed. Everyone else is dead. Charlotte. Tommy. Tammy. Kevin. And poor little Christine, but I think she’s been dead for a few days now. It was the councilors that did it. Jesse and Janet.
I was right. There is a monster in the cave. And one in the lake. And countless others around the camp. I don’t know where they came from, but I know what they want: THEY WANT TO KILL US ALL.

We decided to confront the councilors about their lair in the mountain. Armed with our baseball bats and hockey sticks, we decided to ambush them outside the Mess Hall, but they just smiled at us. I took the lead. I told them that we knew everything. Janet just smiled at me and told me that I know nothing. She said that it was just the wind. And then she began to change. Her smile got wider, literally wider, until it covered almost all of her face. Her teeth got longer until they were fangs, and her eyes got red and began leaking blood. The others started screaming, and the boys ran away. Cowards. I stood my ground. I knew there was a monster. I’m not going crazy. I was RIGHT.
Janet kept changing until I couldn’t recognize her anymore. Her skin got pale white and her hands grew into claws. Her back became hunched and her legs got longer until she was towering over us. I screamed at the other girls to run, and we scattered as Jesse smiled. He hadn’t moved an inch since Janet had begun changing, but he was the least of our problems.
I ran towards the cabin, but I stopped when I heard Charlotte screaming. I turned back just as a man dressed as a cowboy grabbed her as he stepped off the front porch of the Mess Hall. A chill ran through me as I remembered that Christine had been terrified because she’d seen him on her first day. I changed direction and ran towards them, yelling at him to let Charlotte go, but it was too late. The man had already killed her. He snapped her neck, and then he began to bite her. He was EATING HER. It made me feel sick, but there was nothing I could do for her now. I turned around and began running back to the cabin. All I could hear was screams as the rest of my friends were killed by Janet. When I reached the steps to the cabin, I turned around. Bits of bodies were flying through the air. Jesse had apparently also turned into a monster, because there were two of them, ripping children apart like a present on Christmas Day. I looked past them and saw Kevin and Tommy by the lake. Or rather, ABOVE the lake. A giant sea monster had them in its tentacles, and I knew that it was Briony. There was nothing I could do for any of them. I was their leader and I’d failed them. There was nothing I could do.
I ran into the cabin and slammed the door. I pushed as much furniture as I could against the door and hid under my bed. The only thing I paused for was to grab my diary. I know I’m going to die. There’s no way out of this. The most I can hope for is for someone to find this diary. They need to know the truth about this place.
I can hear the monsters outside the door, trying to get in. I’m scared. I want my parents. This never would have happened if they hadn’t sent me here. This never would have happe

27th September 2024

Friday

28th September 2024

Saturday

29th September 2024

Sunday

30th September 2024

Monday

1st October 2024

Tuesday

The councilors were right. It was just the wind. And I’m much happier now.

GLOWING REVIEW FOR CONTROVERSIAL ‘SUMMER CAMP’ FOR TROUBLED CHILDREN

Brilliant new methods gain praise in the understanding and treatment of childhood psychopathy.

Happy Times Summer Camp for Troubled Kids, nestled in the mountains and forests of Oregon, has gained a myriad of positive reviews from both parents and government officials after the graduation of the inaugural class.

The summer camp, a subsidiary of the Department of Corrections, is the first of its kind within the United States of America. To the children, it is a summer camp where they can learn new skills and make new friends, but to the councilors and the parents, it is a juvenile detention center for children who have committed crimes deemed too dangerous for them to be sent to a ‘normal’ detention center. 

Run by twins Jesse and Janet McCoy, Happy Times was seen – at its inception – to be a barbaric and controversial experiment on whether it is in fact possible to treat childhood psychopathy. The Department of Corrections came under fire from researchers and parents alike who deemed the camp to be nothing more than a way to get those few children too dangerous to be allowed to roam free away from society, but even the naysayers cannot argue with the results. 

On 31st October 2024, this reporter had the immense pleasure to attend the graduation of the inaugural class of Happy Times. I will admit to having concerns about the mental state of the children present, but I was overjoyed when I was introduced to the most polite and friendly young people I have ever met. It was easy for me to forget that these children were ‘incarcerated’ due to crimes so heinous that they were deemed ‘psychopaths’. The children in question, whose identities are protected by state law, showed no signs of being the killers they’ve been made out as; they simply seemed like normal, happy children.
When asked about their methods, the McCoy twins simply smiled and tapped their noses – clearly, they will not be giving away any of their secrets anytime soon. But this reporter has heard tell of a growing waitlist for the Happy Times Summer Camp, and I can certainly see why.
The McCoy twins, and certainly the Department of Corrections itself, should be praised and commended for the change they have brought about in these children, allowing them to now go free and live long, happy, normal lives as upstanding members of society.

She Is A Haunting

I would like to begin by apologising; I haven’t made a post in a few weeks. I got a full time job, and figuring out how to balance this blog, my writing, and life in general with work isn’t easy for me, though I do hope to get better at this in the next few weeks. Thankfully, today I have a day off, so I will be writing a couple of posts and scheduling them to automatically go live. Now that I’ve explained, let’s get into the review.

*****

This house eats and is eaten.

This summer, Jade Nguyen has one goal: to survive living a lie with her sister and their estranged dad while he fixes up a decaying colonial house in Vietnam. If she can be straight enough, Vietnamese enough, American enough, then college and freedom will be hers.

But the house has other plans. Dead bugs line its windowsills and its gardens grow monstrous blooms. Then the ghost of a beautiful bride gives Jade a cryptic warning: DON’T EAT.

With the help of rebellious local girl Florence, Jade is determined to prove the house is haunted, and that it won’t rest until it consumed her family completely.

*****

I found this book completely by accident. I was shopping in Gay’s the Word in London (one of my favourite places) and I picked it up. I’ve struggled to find good sapphic horror in the past (especially that isn’t ‘dark romance’ or ‘spicy’), so I was so excited when I read the back of the book. I tore through it on the bus to work in about three days. I would like to apologise (again) for the lack of diacritical marks above the names of the Vietnamese places; I have no idea how to add them on this website. The names will be written with an asterisk after them so you know that this isn’t how they’d normally be written.

‘She Is A Haunting’ follows seventeen year old Jade as she travels to Vietnam for the first time. Both of her parents were born there, but she herself had never been before. She first travels to Saigon with her mother, sister and brother, and then her sister and her fly to visit their estranged father in Da Lat*, where he is renovating a French colonial hotel that he hopes to turn into a hotel.

The reason for the visit is simple: Jade wants her father’s money to pay for college. She has watched her mother struggle to provide for her family for years, and refuses to let her mother pick up more hours at work to pay the fees. Her father has agreed to finance her first year of college if she visits him – the first time she’ll see him since he left his family years ago. And so, Jade finds herself taking up residence in the house (called Nha Hoa*) alongside her father and her younger sister, Lily.

The house was first built by French colonizers, and it is a grand house. Trang Thanh Tran’s descriptions of the house made it easy for me to imagine what it looked like, and I found myself entranced. At first, Nha Hoa* seems like an idyllic house, steeped in potential and nestled within the forests of Da Lat*, but Jade soon learns that looks can be misleading.

When she first enters her room for the next five weeks, she notices a cacophony of dead bugs littering the windowsill. She is disgusted, but she simply explains this by blaming her father; she still hasn’t forgiven him for leaving, and finds any reason to blame him for… well, everything. From the start, the reader is aware of the strained (or non-existent) family dynamic, but that is not what I’m most excited to speak about it this review.

Things pretty much take a turn for the worse very quickly. While there are strange things happening and strange feelings that Jade has, the first real sign of a haunting comes when Jade wakes up in the middle of the night and bumps into a woman in the kitchen. At first, she thinks her father is simply bringing people home, but she soon realizes that this isn’t the case when the woman turns to her. Jade realizes that she’s dreaming, but then the woman speaks to her. Two words: “Dung an*“. Don’t eat. The woman holds her hands out to Jade, revealing a squirming mass of maggots on her palms, and it only gets worse from here. Jade flees back to her room, hoping against hope that it was nothing more than a dream and knowing, somewhere deep down, that she was wide awake.

From here, the plot moves quickly, with the introduction of more characters including local Vietnamese girl Florence, and Alma and Thomas, a white couple who have essentially funded Ba’s (Jade’s father’s) renovation of Nha Hoa*. I personally liked the introduction of Alma, simply because when she was talking about her dissertation topic (the founding of French Indochina), Jade states that she “has a degree in colonization”. This bit made me laugh maybe more than it should have.

‘She Is A Haunting’ is filled to the brim with gross descriptions (I wouldn’t necessarily call it ‘gore’). For me, it was expertly done. I found myself slightly queasy in parts, which is exactly the kind of reaction I want from my horror books. The most disgusting part that had me muttering to myself came when Jade was dreaming.

The ghost she’d seen in the kitchen (who’s name is Cam, as Jade learned) has been showing her memories from her own life. Cam seems as though she wants to help Jade figure out what’s going on in Nha Hoa*, and she shows Jade the former owner of the house, Frenchwoman Marion Dumont. Marion suffered with agoraphobia when she was alive, and is described as evil, cruel, and insanely racist, calling the Vietnamese characters “little rat”. The reader immediately hates her (as they should), but soon learns that Marion’s agoraphobia doesn’t stop when she’s dead. She remains in the house, incensed that her house has been overrun by the people whose country it was built in.

She appears before Jade in the middle of the night, disguising herself as Cam (who Jade has a strange kind of crush on) before revealing herself. She presses her hand down on Jade’s neck, and Jade realizes that she’s awake. She begins to panic as Marion’s body moves away. The only thing is… Marion’s head doesn’t move. Instead, her neck elongates, taking on the same kind of texture as taffy (the author’s choice of words). While the book is chock full of unsettling descriptions, this is by far my favourite. It is so visceral and easy to imagine that I found myself recoiling, but yet unable to stop reading.

Another part of the book that I really enjoyed comes in the form of small ‘mini-chapters’. Each couple of chapters, there is a small half page of writing, titled with the name of an organ/part of the body. These are: Mouth, kidney, appendix, eye, brain, dermis, liver, larynx, marrow, tendon, tongue, stomach, and heart. These sections kept me reading; I wanted to know what the next body part would be. These sections are written in a completely different way from the rest of the book, and I found it intriguing, although it took me entirely too long to realize that these parts were written from the POV of the house itself.

If I had one issue with this book, it would be that the ‘finale’ seems a little rushed. We spend so much time learning about the history of the house for the finale to last two (short) chapters and then culminate in the characters leaving the house to rot. While I did enjoy the ending, it could have done with a little more.

I know that ‘She Is A Haunting’ only has a 3.41 rating on Goodreads, but for me, this book is awarded 5 stars. The horror elements of the book are very well done, and I found the plot captivating and genuinely well written. I recommend picking up a copy if you also like creepy, gross, sapphic books.

If you have any recommendations for books, please get in touch with me on Instagram (@thetaysmitheffect) or Twitter (@taysmitheffect). I should probably be reading my physical TBR, but I’m always in search of new and exciting books to add to my growing list of 5 star reads. I’m looking for horror, and preferably sapphic books, but this isn’t a necessity.

Buy it here:

Waterstones

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No Good Deed

The cemetery was quiet, as it often was. Not many people traveled to this part of the lot; most of the graves were of people who died decades ago, and they had been forgotten, left to rot and decay without so much as a thought of sympathy from the living. Well, almost. There were still a few do-gooders that came to this part of the cemetery every few months. They reinvigorated the graves of the forgotten and gave them new life; they saw it as a way to remember the dead who had long been ignored. They had an online forum they spoke on, planning their excursions so that they could get to as many cemeteries as possible, organizing themselves meticulously. For a lot of them, it was a way to mourn long lost family that didn’t have a grave, and they spent far more time than was necessary at the graves. They would clean the rough stones, getting rid of the weeds snaking up from the ground.
At least, that’s what Christopher Neal did. He found it peaceful to just sit by a grave and work for a few hours. Often, he would talk to the graves; he liked the thought of talking to the dead, letting them know that they were still remembered.
His graying hair moved in the breeze as he looked around the cemetery, his eyes still filled with childlike wonder as he surveyed his workspace. This particular cemetery was one of his favorites to work at, and he knew his way around as if it was his own home. He knew exactly where to turn as he cut through a small, natural path, the ground worn down from years of use. The ground was uneven, but he was steady on his feet, even in his old age, as he got closer to the grave he would be cleaning today.
The grave was too worn for him to make out the name inscribed on it, and the thought saddened him. He was getting older, in his sixties now, and he was terrified of being forgotten. That was part of the reason he’d joined the forum; it gave him comfort to know that, someday, when he was dead and buried, someone would return the favor and sit with him in his grave.
As he neared the grave he’d been assigned by the admins of the forum, he slowed, a sense of unease twisting in his gut. He felt like he was being watched. He could feel eyes watching him, and he didn’t like it. Looking around, he saw nobody. It was just him and the remains of the dead. He decided to brush the feeling off and continued on his journey. The feeling, though he tried to ignore it, would not stop gnawing at him, and that was why he didn’t notice the open grave. As he turned to look behind him, he felt the earth give out beneath him, and suddenly he was falling. He screamed as he fell, landing with a thud on the freshly dug dirt. He groaned as pain lanced through his shoulder, and he struggled to sit up. His first instinct was to look up, through the hole he’d fallen through. He could see the blue sky above him, framed by the high walls of the hole.
“Shit,” he muttered, putting his hands on the ground behind him to try and stand up. He froze as something moved beneath his hand. Peering down, he screamed as he saw what he was surrounded by.
Snakes. They were all over the ground, twisting to get away from him. He recognized a few species from specials he’d seen on the Discovery Channel – Boa Constrictor, Eastern Brown Snake, and before it dipped into the dirt just beyond his feet, he swore he saw a Black Mamba. None of that was important, though. Not when he saw the body. A mere foot away sat a man, his back turned to Christopher as he sat, his head pressed against the dirt wall of the grave. His clothes were dirty, and it was clear that he was dead. The skin that Christopher could see was covered in bites, and while Christopher didn’t know much about snakes, he knew that some of the species in the pit were venomous.
His blood ran cold as he remembered the Black Mamba he thought he’d seen. I have to get out of here, he thought, finally scrambling to his feet and trying his hardest to avoid the snakes littering the bottom of the pit. He looked upwards, towards the top of the hole, the sight of the clear sky above him filling him with hope. He estimated that the pit was nine feet deep, and he couldn’t help the surge of panic that swelled in his chest as he realized that there was no way he’d be able to scale the walls of the pit without something to help him. He was getting old, and his mobility was slowly getting worse.
He looked around and spotted a thick root growing from the tree not far away from the pit. It jutted out of the side of the pit slightly, and if he stretched a bit, he thought he may be able to reach it. With a great amount of care, he made his way over to the root, taking care not to step on any of the snakes gliding along the dirt. Raising his hand up, he froze as he noticed the figure standing over the pit. Dressed all in black, with a mask covering their face, the figure shifted slightly, and Christopher noticed the large bucket they were holding. He couldn’t see inside, but it filled him with a feeling of dread. His fear of the snakes, however, was stronger than the feeling in his gut.
“Help me,” he begged, “Please, I need to get out of here.” The figure stayed silent, staring at him, unseen eyes boring into him. “Help me!” Christopher wailed, his panic beginning to rise. The figure ignored him still. They moved the bucket from their left hand to their right, using their free hand to upturn it.
Christopher screamed as he saw the snakes raining down on him. He backed up, not caring what he stepped on this time. He only stopped when his feet hit the body of the man, and he went careening over, falling into the wall and sliding along it until he hit the ground. He landed with a thud on his back, just in time to see the figure drop the bucket on the ground and slowly walk away. Christopher tried to stand, but his fall had startled the snakes, and they did not appreciate the sudden movements he’d made.
The snakes came at him from all directions, curling around his arms and legs, and he did his best to try and fend them off. There were too many. Pain erupted all over his body as they bit him, their sharp fangs piercing his skin. As he lay on his back, staring up to the sky, he thought it ironic that he would die here, already surrounded by the dead. He only hoped that someone would remember him.

Our Wives Under the Sea

I have to admit that when I heard of this book, I had no idea what it was about. I saw it in my favourite bookstore (Gay’s the Word in London), and I immediately knew that I wanted it. I didn’t look online to see what it was about; I prefer to be surprised. Of course I heard good things about it, and I was excited to start it. Long story short: it lives up to the hype.

I think the thing that drew me to the book was originally the cover, and then the premise of ‘came back wrong’ that is so prevalent in this book. That particular trope has always intrigued me, and I was excited to see it in a sapphic book.

The story follows Miri and her wife, Leah. Leah, a marine scientist, has recently returned from a disastrous submarine expedition. She was originally supposed to be gone for only three weeks. Something went wrong, and Leah was gone, trapped at the bottom of the ocean, for six months. Miri had given up hope of her wife ever returning, so when the mysterious Centre, Leah’s employer, tells her that Leah has returned, she’s ecstatic at the thought of having her love back with her.

But Leah came back… wrong. Whatever Miri was expecting to find, it was not what greeted her. Leah no longer has any interest in movies, one of their favourite things to do together, and rarely speaks. When she does, her words are always about the sea, while giving nothing away about what happened, and Miri doesn’t want to ask. As the story progresses, we see the extent to which their relationship has changed from the early days of their love story, with small tidbits of information given to us as Miri reminisces on how the two met.

The dual POVs of Miri and Leah tell the story in an artful way which I loved. Julia Armfield switches between the two for the entirety of the book, and we slowly begin to learn more about the couple and what exactly happened to Leah on the expedition.

While Miri’s chapters tell us of the aftermath and the changes she sees in Leah, Leah’s chapters slowly tell us about the way the submarine simply… stopped working, sinking into the ocean before coming to rest on the bottom. Leah and her crew members have no way of knowing what went wrong or how long they’ve been down there, and she tells us how it affects them in such a way that I couldn’t put the book down. I desperately wanted to know what happened.

By the end of the book, I still wasn’t entirely sure what happened. Was it cabin fever? Was it a strange form of evolution which made Leah unable to survive outside of the sea? Or was it something more sinister; she tells us how her crewmate begins to hear a voice down in the dark of the ocean. The not knowing exactly what happened enthralls me, and I truly believe that I will re-read this book in the future.

Our Wives Under the Sea is unlike any horror book I have ever read (and I’ve read a lot). It is both a horror and a love story, the ending bittersweet as Miri releases Leah back into the sea. The book made me laugh as Miri tells us of the early days of their relationship, and made me cry as she realised that saving – or fixing – Leah, was an impossible task.

Ultimately, this is a book I’m happy I bought, and has secured it’s place as my first 5 star read of 2024. I highly recommend picking up a copy of this masterpiece.

Buy it here:

Gay’s The Word

Waterstones

bookshop.org